Thursday, August 26, 2010

ditchin mom for school



Yep, you looked at that picture correctly. That's ALL 3 of my kiddos wearing backpacks!
All of them left me. Ditched the nest. Grew their own wings. For a few hours a day at least. They all come running back in the afternoon to tell me how much they love me. Or ask for food.
They've been home schooled or "road-schooled" for the past few years. Kaleb went back for part of the year last year up in WA, but my girls stayed home with me and hit the books.
This year, with the move to a small town, they all felt they wanted to go back to "real school" mainly to meet new friends. It was hard for me, but I get it. They left all their friends 2 years ago and miss those friendship bonds. They've met great friends on the road, but it's just not the same as having them right down the road.
I'll be honest, I had anxiety. Seriously sleep issues as the first day of school approached. But I was the only one. The kids all slept with ease. Not an ounce of fear about being the new kid. Not one speck of hesitation. In fact, Kaleb refused to let us walk him to school. I did follow him with the girls. We have to walk pass his school to get to theirs (really, I swear I wasn't stalking). I had my camera ready as I yelled out his name to snap a picture. It's the only way at his age. :) He is, after all, a big middle schooler. (7th grade) How embarrassing to have your mommy help you find your way. He reassured me he'd be fine. And guess what....he was!
Now came the hard part. Letting go of my baby girls!! I made Daddy go to work late so he could come along, mainly to be MY support system.
Ani is entering 4th grade. She was smiling ear to ear! She reminded me that she hasn't been in "real" school since the 1st grade. There's a big difference between 1st and 4th. She's so big now and so independent. Where'd my baby go? She's the girl in class that makes every teacher smile. She's everyone's friend! She was a little concerned at first cause *gasp* she has a MALE teacher. No problem though, he's already wrapped himself around her finger. She thinks he's hilarious! She's a book of information already because of him. I'm pretty confident that she's going to have a great year!
Little Miss Avery.......My treasure. Who makes me go crazy every day! And then makes me laugh til I pee. What will I ever do without her. She's my buddy. She goes everywhere with me. She calls me out when I'm being "bad" and compliments me when I need to smile. She can read me like an open book. And she's been waiting for this 1st day of school for a few years now.
I was that mom that cried on orientation night. How was I ever going to get through the drop-off? She had her "pack-back" packed and ready 2 days ahead of schedule. She leaped out of bed before the alarm clock went off. She was ready and the bell couldn't ring soon enough. I, on the other hand, seriously contemplated grabbing her and running away to Never Never Land.
She shed no tears. Didn't even hesitate at the door. This was her moment! She hugged and kissed mommy and daddy goodbye. Then she kissed her momma again. And again. And again. But only because I made her. It was time for me to let her go. How dramatic right!!! :)
I was fine. Really I was. Until I walked outside and my hubby said "Alright Babe, I've got to go to work".
WAIT A MINUTE!! STOP RIGHT THERE!!!! HE WAS LEAVING ME TOO!! DAMN!
I was really going to be alone. Seriously ALONE! Now the tears starting falling. Alligator tears. Runny nose. Yep, it happened. I was that mom. Who stood on the sidewalk outside of the school balling! Now what? For the first time in 12 years I was going to be alone. Jason looked at me and told me that now it was time to take care of me. Hmmmm, that sounds great. But I'm clueless how to do that. I walked home. Poured a cup of coffee and stared at the walls. I watched the clock. Could I go pick them up yet???? I paced. I cleaned. I paced some more.
Finally it was time to go get Avery. I was so excited to see her, take her out for ice cream and hear about her day. She greeted me with a huge hug. As we walked home I asked her if she missed me as much as I missed her. Her response..."I forgot all about you Mom"
HUMPH.......A note to all Kindy teachers. First lesson...How to lie to your mom and make her feel good!!!!

1 comment:

Family of Movers said...

That made me sooo sad. But I'm sure one day it will come for me too. Sad you aren't traveling anymore. Maybe you'll pick it up again. :)